TenaciousBuzz
Varsity Lurker
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- May 24, 2003
- Messages
- 368
...humanity's cruelest mistake.
Consider the Bulldog...
- Thread starter TenaciousBuzz
- Start date
southendzoneBEE
Gailey-Like
- Joined
- Dec 20, 2009
- Messages
- 13,579
This would be a good thread to lament the breeding practices of UGA, Georgia's saggy, depressed, disease riddled, incestuous animal mascot. It is sad what they have done to that line of Bulldogs. Compare UGA to Yale's bulldog and see what you find.
covingtonjacket
Knowledge superspreader
- Joined
- Dec 6, 2011
- Messages
- 1,565
http://www.nytimes.com/2011/11/27/magazine/can-the-bulldog-be-saved.html
“They aren’t athletic or especially healthy,” she said. “Most can’t have sex without help — they’re too short and stocky. Most can’t give birth on their own — their heads are too big. A breed that has trouble doing those two things is, by definition, in trouble.”
"...bulldogs are the most relentless farters in the canine world."
“if bulldogs were the product of genetic engineering by agripharmaceutical corporations, there would be protest demonstrations throughout the Western world, and rightly so."
“They aren’t athletic or especially healthy,” she said. “Most can’t have sex without help — they’re too short and stocky. Most can’t give birth on their own — their heads are too big. A breed that has trouble doing those two things is, by definition, in trouble.”
"...bulldogs are the most relentless farters in the canine world."
“if bulldogs were the product of genetic engineering by agripharmaceutical corporations, there would be protest demonstrations throughout the Western world, and rightly so."
coit
Bullseye
- Joined
- Nov 29, 2007
- Messages
- 93,369
What is funnier than a dead bulldawg puppy?
A dead bulldawg puppy in a clown costume.
What is the difference between a bulldawg puppy and a onion?
No one cries when you chop up the bulldawg puppy.
What is the difference between a dead bulldawg puppy and a watermelon?
One's fun to hit with a sledge hammer, the other one's a watermelon.
What is the difference between a bulldawg puppy and a dart-board?
Dart-boards don't bleed.
What is the difference between a bulldawg puppy and a mars bar?
About 500 calories.
Why did the family take the dead bulldawg puppy along on the cookout?
So they could light it and toast their marshmallows.
Why was the dead bulldawg puppy kept in the kitchen drawer?
The family used it to crack nuts.
Why did the bulldawg puppy cross the road?
It was stapled to the chicken.
How do you know when a bulldawg puppy is dead?
It doesn't cry if you nail its feet to the ceiling.
How do you find the live bulldawg puppy in a pile of dead ones?
Jab 'em all with a pitchfork.
How do you save a drowning bulldawg puppy?
Harpoon it.
How do you turn a bulldawg puppy into a cat?
Freeze it solid, then run it through a bandsaw. Meeow.
How do you make a dead bulldawg puppy float?
Take your foot off its head.
What do you call a dead bulldawg puppy pinned to your wall?
Art.
What is red, bubbly, and scratches at the window before exploding?
A bulldawg puppy in a microwave.
What is red and hangs around trees?
A bulldawg puppy hit by a snow blower.
What is green and hangs around trees?
Same bulldawg puppy 3 weeks later.
What is pink and red and silver and crawls into walls?
A bulldawg puppy with forks in its eyes.
What is pink and goes black with a "hiss."?
A bulldawg puppy thrown into a furnace.
What is brown and gurgles?
A bulldawg puppy in a casserole.
What is purple, covered in pus, and squeals?
A peeled bulldawg puppy in a bag of salt.
What is black and goes up and down?
A bulldawg puppy in a toaster.
What is red and goes round and round?
A bulldawg puppy in a garbage disposal.
What is red and swings back and forth?
A bulldawg puppy on a meat hook.
What is red, screams, and goes around in circles?
A bulldawg puppy nailed to the floor.
What is blue and sits in the corner?
A bulldawg puppy in a baggie.
What is green and sits in the corner?
Same bulldawg puppy two weeks later.
What is black and charred?
A bulldawg puppy chewing on an extension cord.
What is black and white, runs around the room, and smokes?
A bulldawg puppy with his hair on fire.
What is blue and flies around the room at high speeds?
A bulldawg puppy with a punctured lung.
What is cold, blue and doesn't move?
A bulldawg puppy in your freezer.
What is pink, flies and squeals?
A bulldawg puppy fired from a catapult.
What is red and has more brains than the bulldawg puppy you just shot?
The wall behind it.
What is white and glows pink?
A dead bulldawg puppy with an electrode up its ass.
What is more fun than nailing a bulldawg puppy to a wall?
Ripping it off again.
What is more fun than throwing a bulldawg puppy off the cliff?
Catching it with a pitchfork.
What bounces up and down at 100mph?
A bulldawg puppy tied to the back of a truck.
What is red and pink and can't turn round in a corridor?
A bulldawg puppy with a javelin through its throat.
What is little and can't fit through a door?
A bulldawg puppy with a spear in its head.
What is grosser than ten dead bulldawg puppies nailed to a tree?
One dead bulldawg puppy nailed to ten trees.
Know what's gross?
Running over a bulldawg puppy with a truck.
Know whats worse?
Skidding on it.
Worse than that?
Peeling it off the tires.
What is the worst part about killing a bulldawg puppy?
Getting blood on your clown suit.
A dead bulldawg puppy in a clown costume.
What is the difference between a bulldawg puppy and a onion?
No one cries when you chop up the bulldawg puppy.
What is the difference between a dead bulldawg puppy and a watermelon?
One's fun to hit with a sledge hammer, the other one's a watermelon.
What is the difference between a bulldawg puppy and a dart-board?
Dart-boards don't bleed.
What is the difference between a bulldawg puppy and a mars bar?
About 500 calories.
Why did the family take the dead bulldawg puppy along on the cookout?
So they could light it and toast their marshmallows.
Why was the dead bulldawg puppy kept in the kitchen drawer?
The family used it to crack nuts.
Why did the bulldawg puppy cross the road?
It was stapled to the chicken.
How do you know when a bulldawg puppy is dead?
It doesn't cry if you nail its feet to the ceiling.
How do you find the live bulldawg puppy in a pile of dead ones?
Jab 'em all with a pitchfork.
How do you save a drowning bulldawg puppy?
Harpoon it.
How do you turn a bulldawg puppy into a cat?
Freeze it solid, then run it through a bandsaw. Meeow.
How do you make a dead bulldawg puppy float?
Take your foot off its head.
What do you call a dead bulldawg puppy pinned to your wall?
Art.
What is red, bubbly, and scratches at the window before exploding?
A bulldawg puppy in a microwave.
What is red and hangs around trees?
A bulldawg puppy hit by a snow blower.
What is green and hangs around trees?
Same bulldawg puppy 3 weeks later.
What is pink and red and silver and crawls into walls?
A bulldawg puppy with forks in its eyes.
What is pink and goes black with a "hiss."?
A bulldawg puppy thrown into a furnace.
What is brown and gurgles?
A bulldawg puppy in a casserole.
What is purple, covered in pus, and squeals?
A peeled bulldawg puppy in a bag of salt.
What is black and goes up and down?
A bulldawg puppy in a toaster.
What is red and goes round and round?
A bulldawg puppy in a garbage disposal.
What is red and swings back and forth?
A bulldawg puppy on a meat hook.
What is red, screams, and goes around in circles?
A bulldawg puppy nailed to the floor.
What is blue and sits in the corner?
A bulldawg puppy in a baggie.
What is green and sits in the corner?
Same bulldawg puppy two weeks later.
What is black and charred?
A bulldawg puppy chewing on an extension cord.
What is black and white, runs around the room, and smokes?
A bulldawg puppy with his hair on fire.
What is blue and flies around the room at high speeds?
A bulldawg puppy with a punctured lung.
What is cold, blue and doesn't move?
A bulldawg puppy in your freezer.
What is pink, flies and squeals?
A bulldawg puppy fired from a catapult.
What is red and has more brains than the bulldawg puppy you just shot?
The wall behind it.
What is white and glows pink?
A dead bulldawg puppy with an electrode up its ass.
What is more fun than nailing a bulldawg puppy to a wall?
Ripping it off again.
What is more fun than throwing a bulldawg puppy off the cliff?
Catching it with a pitchfork.
What bounces up and down at 100mph?
A bulldawg puppy tied to the back of a truck.
What is red and pink and can't turn round in a corridor?
A bulldawg puppy with a javelin through its throat.
What is little and can't fit through a door?
A bulldawg puppy with a spear in its head.
What is grosser than ten dead bulldawg puppies nailed to a tree?
One dead bulldawg puppy nailed to ten trees.
Know what's gross?
Running over a bulldawg puppy with a truck.
Know whats worse?
Skidding on it.
Worse than that?
Peeling it off the tires.
What is the worst part about killing a bulldawg puppy?
Getting blood on your clown suit.
spandex
Varsity Lurker
- Joined
- Aug 15, 2007
- Messages
- 450
Who collects the data for bestowing such a distinction?
I'll bet that the bulldogs are actually burping, but it's too difficult to tell which end is which.
covingtonjacket
Knowledge superspreader
- Joined
- Dec 6, 2011
- Messages
- 1,565
I would think that their spouses would vouch for "most relentless farters"
RamblinWreck92
Dodd-Like
- Joined
- Oct 14, 2013
- Messages
- 13,596
öööö those stupid animals.
JacketFan77
Bokonon High Priest
- Joined
- Aug 19, 2010
- Messages
- 21,231
Is it really the animal's fault that cult of slaven low-life dipshits chose the poor animal to inbreed and reduce it to a genetic cesspool?
RamblinWreck92
Dodd-Like
- Joined
- Oct 14, 2013
- Messages
- 13,596
to hell with everything related to that shithole known as 'athens'. Including the stupid dog.