As someone who lost a younger sister 40 years ago, I've made it a point to say nothing more than "I'm sorry" to those that have unfortunately lost a loved one. I don't consider my lack of expression as being rude or uncaring, but just respectful. People generally mean well, and are trying to be empathetic, but in reality sometimes just don't know what the right thing to say or do is at that particular moment in time.
As for those that have assumed the position of "Stingtalk Thought Patrol Squad", you probably get a kick out of condemning anyone that you consider stepping outside your defined idea of what is good death etiquette and what is not. Give it a break. You don't honestly think that CBK purposefully wanted to come off as being a non-empathetic (FILL IN THE BLANK) do you? If so, I suggest you take it up with him personally rather than debating it as a fly by mission on ST.