You’re the AD, who would you hire after next game?

Who would you hire?

  • Mullen

  • Monken

  • Malzahn

  • Fuente

  • Whisenhunt

  • Bowden

  • Someone else

  • Keep Collins

Results are only viewable after voting.
aeromech said:
He was 69-46 at Mississippi State and had 3 teams finish in top 25. He was 34-15 at UF with half his teams finishing in the top 10. He would be a huge step up from coach skinny pants. A coach with a winning record in the SEC should be able to get us back to mediocrity, then we can make a decision from there.
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He also dislikes recruiting, not exactly a winning strategy at Tech.
 
Why the hell should I trust Stansbury to hire a decent coach? Oh wait, I'm the AD! First thing is I prohibit Stansbury from ever setting foot on the campus, and put out the word to all my fellow AD's not to hire him even as a ticket window teller. Next, I sue Collins for fraud and non performance, and claw back all the money I've paid him for the last three years. Next, I hire someone with the nickname of 'Chainsaw' to evaluate the entire AD department. Then I buy a huge set of knee pads, and visit every season ticket holder for the last five years begging for one more chance.

Then I begin a head coach search. If I can stand to be in the room with the candidate, then he is rejected. It is going to take the biggest SOB to ever walk a sideline to straighten this out. He gets a three year contract with most of the money up front. By year three, he knows he will never get another job, so he has to produce a winner to continue coaching. He has to hate the ATL, Waffle House, the 404, the Urinal-Constipation, UNC, Miami, and uga. I want someone that can convince the Hanson brothers, Roman Reigns, and Nasty Nate Stimson that they can legally assault people for twelve Saturdays each fall without going to prison. We can assuage the Politically Correct's sensibilities by giving prison parolees a chance at a college education. That coaches name is probably something rhyming with Patton.

I will have kegger parties before each game in Peter's Park. There are plenty of frustrated cheer leaders laboring away at the Cheetah club. There are two pinata hanging at the North End of BDS that look like Stansbury and Collins. Season ticket holders of 25+ years get first shot at them to get at the Benjamins inside. Visitor locker rooms are full of Covid, and tests are administered at the start of each quarter to ensure player safety.

The best news, though, is that I will do this job for free.
 
I’m a very frugal person. And I’m willing to wait on Monken.
 
JoeCakeEater said:
I honestly believe investing the money in major upgrades at the two coordinator spots would be a better strategy than paying his buyout. We’d never have had that run under OLeary without Fridge. Dabo would never have been what he’s become without Venables.
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Man. I wish I’d thought of that.
 
Mullen is the only one from that list that I would consider. We need a high upside coach probably from a non-P5 school. We need to offer an incentive laden contract no more than 4 years in length. We also need to provide the money necessary to hire quality assistants.
 
Probably standing pat at HC is the sensible move. I dunno. Always thought Gus would be a good fit. Mullen could win some while rehabbing himself for another SEC job. It's all dreaming, I suspect.
 
Killick said:
Why the hell should I trust Stansbury to hire a decent coach? Oh wait, I'm the AD! First thing is I prohibit Stansbury from ever setting foot on the campus, and put out the word to all my fellow AD's not to hire him even as a ticket window teller. Next, I sue Collins for fraud and non performance, and claw back all the money I've paid him for the last three years. Next, I hire someone with the nickname of 'Chainsaw' to evaluate the entire AD department. Then I buy a huge set of knee pads, and visit every season ticket holder for the last five years begging for one more chance.

Then I begin a head coach search. If I can stand to be in the room with the candidate, then he is rejected. It is going to take the biggest SOB to ever walk a sideline to straighten this out. He gets a three year contract with most of the money up front. By year three, he knows he will never get another job, so he has to produce a winner to continue coaching. He has to hate the ATL, Waffle House, the 404, the Urinal-Constipation, UNC, Miami, and uga. I want someone that can convince the Hanson brothers, Roman Reigns, and Nasty Nate Stimson that they can legally assault people for twelve Saturdays each fall without going to prison. We can assuage the Politically Correct's sensibilities by giving prison parolees a chance at a college education. That coaches name is probably something rhyming with Patton.

I will have kegger parties before each game in Peter's Park. There are plenty of frustrated cheer leaders laboring away at the Cheetah club. There are two pinata hanging at the North End of BDS that look like Stansbury and Collins. Season ticket holders of 25+ years get first shot at them to get at the Benjamins inside. Visitor locker rooms are full of Covid, and tests are administered at the start of each quarter to ensure player safety.

The best news, though, is that I will do this job for free.
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And he has to value and uphold time-tested Tech traditions, and recognize that the school colors are White and Gold. He can use some blue if he needs to, but NEVER NEVER NEVER solid blue uniforms
 
Kendal Briles
Candidates that will be ready for prime time in a few years:
Garrett Riley SMu
Zach Kittley at Houston Baptist
Andy Richman at Eastern Kentucky
 
B said:
I would be leery of a guy who wasn't successful at Florida. That has to be one of the top 10-15 progarms in the country in terms of having all that is needed to win games. Lots of them.
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yeah, but look at his previous success at Mississippi State. They didn't have much of a football program until Mullen. I personally cannot explain his lack of success at UF, but obviously the guy didn't forget how to coach. I think he probably just butted some heads with the big money guys and maybe his ego couldn't tolerate the extra flack he got from the fanbase (especially when MS State fans were just happy to be competitive).
 
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